Two Very Old Friends

Two very elderly friends, Harv and Jack, met in the park every day to feed the pigeons, watch the squirrels and discuss world problems. One day Jack didn't show up, Harv didn't think much about it, figured maybe he had a cold or some such.

But after Jack hadn't shown up for a week or so Harv really got worried. However, the only time they ever got together anymore (they used to play a lot of golf together) was at the park, and Harv couldn't remember where Jack lived so he was unable to find out what had happened to him.

A month passed and Harv figured old Jack had gone to his heavenly reward, but one day Harv approached the park and, lo and behold, there sat Jack ! Harv was very excited and happy to see him and told him so! Then he said, "For crying out loud Jack, what happened to you???"

Jack replied, "I have been in jail."

"Jail???," cried Harv ! "What in the world for???"

"Well," Jack said, "You know Sue, that cute little blond waitress at the coffee shop where we sometimes get coffee?"

"Yeah" said Harv, "I remember her. What about her?"

"Well one day last month she got mad at me and to get even, she charged me with rape. I was so proud of what everyone would think an old Geezer like me could still do, that when I got into court, I plead 'Guilty'. The judge then took a good look at me and gave me 30 days for perjury."