Laws of Life
*Law of Mechanical Repair
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch
and/ or you'll have to pee.
*Law of the Workshop
*Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
*Law of Probability
*The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the
stupidity of your act.
*Law of the Telephone
*If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.
*Law of the Alibi
*If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat
tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.
*Variation Law
*If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start
to move faster than the one you moved to.
*Law of Close Encounters
*The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when
you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
*Law of the Result
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
*Law of Biomechanics
*The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
*Law of the Theater
*At any event, the people whose seats are farthest from the aisle arrive
last.
*Law of Coffee *
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you
to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
*Murphy's Law of Lockers
*If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent
lockers.
*Law of Rugs/Carpets
*The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a
floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the
carpet.
*Law of Location
*No matter where you go, there you are.
*Law of Logical Argument
*Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.
*Brown's Law
*If the shoe fits, it's ugly.
*Oliver's Law
*A closed mouth gathers no feet.
*Wilson's Law
*As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop
making it.
*Doctors' Law
*If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the
time you get there you'll feel better. Don't make an appointment and
you'll stay sick.
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch
and/ or you'll have to pee.
*Law of the Workshop
*Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
*Law of Probability
*The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the
stupidity of your act.
*Law of the Telephone
*If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.
*Law of the Alibi
*If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat
tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.
*Variation Law
*If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start
to move faster than the one you moved to.
*Law of Close Encounters
*The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when
you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
*Law of the Result
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
*Law of Biomechanics
*The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
*Law of the Theater
*At any event, the people whose seats are farthest from the aisle arrive
last.
*Law of Coffee *
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you
to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
*Murphy's Law of Lockers
*If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent
lockers.
*Law of Rugs/Carpets
*The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a
floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the
carpet.
*Law of Location
*No matter where you go, there you are.
*Law of Logical Argument
*Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.
*Brown's Law
*If the shoe fits, it's ugly.
*Oliver's Law
*A closed mouth gathers no feet.
*Wilson's Law
*As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop
making it.
*Doctors' Law
*If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the
time you get there you'll feel better. Don't make an appointment and
you'll stay sick.
Labels: Humour
posted by Jack K. @ 5:23 am
